GREG GUTFELD: It’s time to bomb the cartels in Mexico and save some lives

yes. Here we go! Delicious, delicious water. Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho! Happy Thursday everyone. So let’s get into the holiday spirit and bomb Mexico. Listen to me. It’s not about Mexico, it’s about fentanyl. It is killing our country’s youngest people like crazy.

More than 75% of teen overdose deaths last year were actually fentanyl poisonings, not overdoses. It’s so bad, schools loading on Narcan, a drug used to reverse overdoses. And like Brian Kilmead’s book, you can get it for free in vending machines, just sickening. It’s amazing.

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But Narcan is just a Band-Aid to treat a life-bleeding crisis. And yes, I can tell you that drugs are bad, but that won’t change anyone’s mind. i’m sorry I can’t imagine as a teenager watching clips of Hunter Biden cutting lines on a stripper’s butt and thinking, “Hey, I want no part of that.” I could crack an egg in a pan and say, “That’s your brain on drugs,” but I know that’s just a trick to get me to cook. And anyway, that’s not what you guys come here for, you come here for thoughtful commentary and practical advice from one ridiculously handsome host and four other normal people.

So the first step to ending the drug crisis is to address the supply problem. It’s time to take it out cartels in Mexico, bomb —- out of them. It will all be over in a few minutes. The President’s morning BM lasts longer, and if the operation starts elsewhere, you bomb him too. Mowing the cartel is no different from mowing the lawn. And after a short time, you might be surprised how willing the cartel is to reconsider its investment in fentanyl. After all, they are businessmen. So just change their benefit/risk analysis, because now using drugs carries far more risk than making them. This is not the way it should be, it should be the other way around. If a cartel leader can never unpack a suitcase or figure out whether that strange whistling sound is the sound of a kettle or an incoming missile, he may overestimate the fentanyl revenue stream.

Now the bombing seems cruel considering we have invaded far fewer countries. Remember Grenada in ’83? We turned this place into a sandal resort in about 6 minutes. And why? Worried about the 600 American medical students on the island? Sure, a lot of them are smoking hot nurses, but that’s not what I’m talking about. That’s nothing compared to the 100,000 cartel-related deaths each year. Or how about Panama in ’89? We went after Noriega because he was wanted for drug trafficking. I assure you, he was pushing no homemade Clearasil. Cheap shot. How about Yugoslavia in ’99? You remember that, huh? Coincidentally, when Bill Clinton was caught abusing cigars, he killed fewer people.

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So if protected cartels are killing 100,000 Yankees a year, how is that not war? And it doesn’t matter if Mexico doesn’t agree, if they do the cartels are free to invade us in any case. We didn’t ask Pakistan if we could go in and kill bin Laden. So take care of supplies. But what about demand? Well, we could sew up every Hollywood nostril, which would reduce demand by about 80%. But in reality, we must finally admit that the desire for recreational oblivion is basically impossible to kill.

Some of the 15,000 fentanyl pills were seized by law enforcement.
(Connecticut U.S. Attorney’s Office)

Unfortunately, despite the risks, drugs feel good for people and provide salvation. It even dates back to cavemen. Like, what else was there to do? It’s not like they had Netflix, and if they did, the reaction to it would be the same as we have today, screw this shit, I’m going to smoke dinosaur poop. That’s why they disappeared. We know that laws will not change this aspect of human behavior. Alcohol just got there first, so we take it. Despite vehicular homicide, domestic battery, and celebrity liver transplants. But we’re all entitled to relief, especially anyone who works on The View. Legalize drugs just for the sake of it.

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But if we continue to restrict, say, the prescribing of painkillers, the black market will flourish and these drugs will be deadly. remember to Kids don’t buy fentanyl, they try other things that are poisoned by this substance. Since the smallest amount is very lethal, it’s easier to smuggle and cheaper to use as an ingredient, and a wall won’t stop it unless it’s lined with armed soldiers. You can throw a death scroll right through it. Well, unless you’re Dr. Fauci.

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I thought we should have a laugh there. It reminds me of Dr. Jill throwing her teeth at Joe. aha Finding them tangled in her niece’s hair. Disgusting.

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But fentanyl is so easy to smuggle because a block the size of a Snickers can flatten California. Not a bad idea. Just kidding, I have family there for now. So, my plan is to bomb the supply, reduce the damage among the demand by using safer and cleaner alternatives. It gives us a fighting chance because we’ve lost the war on drugs. So, it’s time to save some lives.